Let's try something a little different this week.
duck, chair, elbow, bananaYou find the following items on a list. What do they have in common? What kind of list might this be and why?
Example: If you found a list that said "onion, carrots, potatoes, beef", it might be a grocery list and perhaps the list-maker was putting together a stew.
We Have A Winner!!! 03/10/10
The producers of The new adventures of MacGyver really wanted to top themselves for bizarre escape scenarios.Winner: davidseven
Reason: I'm not sure I want to imagine what the duck would be used for - here's hoping it's more of a verb and less of a noun!
11 comments:
http://bleemcguire.blogspot.com/2010/03/seven-days-seven-answers_02.html
He looked over the list slowly. Duck, chair, elbow, banana. As a group, they didn't make sense. People would think he was crazy if he walked into a store and asked for this particular list of items. But he had the insight to know that each item had its own special meaning to his daughter. He smiled and shook his head at the same time. It would be a shopping trip to blog about, that is, if he got his rear end in the car. His time was running out. Gracie would be done with preschool in 2 hours. Motivated by the sheer lack of time to procrastinate, he folded the list and put it neatly into his wallet.
Target was about a mile away. It wouldn't take long to drive the distance, but he thought he better factor in 15 minutes. Parking would be a practice in patience. He would need another 15 minutes to check out and 10 to drive to the preschool if he was going to be on time. That left him just under an hour and a half to find the items on the list. He grabbed his keys and practically ran to the garage, starting the car and turning left out of the apartment complex toward Target.
"Excuse me Miss," he said after futilely searching for the items on his own, "do you have any miniature ducks?" She looked at him intrigued from what was probably a hectic yet mundane shift.
"A what?" she said, half smiling.
"A miniature duck. My daughter wants one as a pet for a doll." The associate started to laugh, but waved at him, indicating he should follow her. He tried to wedge himself between the shoppers, their carts, and the random piles of boxes left by over trusting shoppers. She easily out paced him. Still ,he kept moving to the end cap he saw her disappear around. She was standing a few feet down the isle, flipping through packages on hooks.
"There you are!" she said, never taking her eyes off the packages as her agile fingers continued to flip through them demonstrating obvious experience. "This is the doll house section. There should be a little yellow rubber duckie in here somewhere. If its too small, you could try looking in the bathroom department. They will have bigger ones that might work." He looked at her with a great deal of appreciation. The little duck wouldn't work. He'd have to force his way to the other department, but he should be able to find the chair she wanted for her doll house here.
"Forget the duck. I'll get the bigger one. Do you think you can help me find a chair for her doll house?" She quickly moved to a section a few steps closer to him and pulled out three chairs. He chose one, dropping it in his basket. "Do you sell replacement parts for those new robotic dolls? Her's needs a new elbow. The last one was crushed in the car door." Sure enough, she was off and running to a location a few isles away.
"Anything else?" she said, smiling at his absurd list and his long handsome face.
"A banana. But I am guessing I can find that in the grocery section."
She nodded. "Unless it is something she needs for her doll again."
He laughed. "Not this time. It's for what I hope will be fabulous banana splits. It's a Christmas Eve tradition for the two of us."
"Well, I hope your Christmas is merry and that she is getting everything on her list." She smiled one last time and turned to help the new costumer tapping her on the shoulder.
He walked away smiling. Once he picked up the rubber duckie, he'd have everything on her list. He checked his watch as he entered the bath department. He had 35 minutes to spare. That would be enough time to actually take the gifts home and hide them for the next two days. It was going to be a good Christmas.
How to get an audience to laugh
Trip on a banana peel to get a sure laugh.
Silly words like "elbow" might work in your gaffe.
A duck's "Quack quack"
Might get them to crack.
Then fall of a chair, when it breaks in half.
This is a list of some of the many ways I have injured myself - running over my own foot with my wheelchair, forgetting to duck as I closed the upper cupboard door, smashing my elbow repeatedly on the corner of the counter that sticks out just an inch too far, and choking on a piece of banana (because slipping on a banana peel is so overdone apparently and I have to be different and unique in my injuries). Also on the list are stabbing my leg with a pen through my blue jeans pocket, dripping hot glue onto my fingers, pouring shampoo into my eyes when I missed my hair, and stapling my own finger, among others.
I was walking through the cafeteria, when I heard one of my students yell, “Mrs. Victory, Duck!” At the same moment, a banana came flying toward my head. In an attempt to dodge the tropical projectile, I slipped and banged my elbow on a chair. It turned out I had walked into the middle of a food fight. After I picked myself up and dusted myself off, I made the rabble-rousers clean up the mess. It is a day I will never forget.
The ultimate reason why I'm not at work today
Today I was sitting in a chair doing what all my teachers had always yelled at me for--tipping it back on 2 legs. Suddenly a duck came by the window. In my excitement, I fell backwards in the chair, managing to bruise the side of my face. I returned to my feet, dazed, only to forget that I had previously been eating a banana. I slipped on the peel of the banana, and fell once more, dislocating my elbow.
This is the list I would make if my almost-4-Yr-old granddaughter Emily were coming for dinner.
1) Duck down and give here a hug. I oves me some Em hugs.
2) Chair - have a chair ready by the conter so she can help me make dinner.
3) Elbow - we're making macaroni, a stellar kids favorite.
4) Banana - hile the water is boiling, we'll cut up a banana and put it in the pudding to have for dessert.
Lots of carbs, but great fun.
Cheers!
JxB
The producers of The new adventures of MacGyver really wanted to top themselves for bizarre escape scenarios.
Oh, davidseven, we totally need a MacGyver remake!
Say what you will about his mullet; I had such a crush on him when I was a kid....
In second grade, my teacher wouldn't assign homework on Monday nights because that was MacGyver night. I had a crush on both MacGyver AND Mr. Rounds.
Duck and banana
Tip the chair into elbow:
Comedy skit done.
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